Dame Deborah James’ husband Sebastien is ‘back in the dating game’ after she gave him ‘strict instructions’ before her tragic death from bowel cancer aged 40
Before she died Dame Deborah James gave her devoted husband Sebastien Bowen strict instructions – she wanted him to ‘move on’ and find love again in the years that followed.
Now, two years on from Deborah’s brave battle with bowel cancer, friends have told MailOnline that her widower is find happiness by dipping his toe into the dating scene.
Sources close to Dame Deborah’s husband say he has been on a number of dates as he attempts to rebuild his life following the campaigner’s death in June 2022 after raising more than £11 million for cancer research via her Bowelbabe fund.
One source close to the couple revealed: ‘It’s still very early days for Seb but he is now dipping his toes back into the world of dating. It’s what Deborah would have wanted but he’s taking things very slowly and isn’t in a rush for anything serious.
‘Deborah is going to be a tough act to follow because they had a fantastic marriage and made a great couple. But Seb feels that the time has now come for him to move on, as Deborah wanted him to and the rest of the family are supporting him.’
Another friend said: ‘He’s been on a few dates, but they’ve not led to anything major although I’m sure some of these women would love to have a serious relationship with him and are delighted that he’s back in the game.
‘We’re happy for him and he’s comfortable with it all because he knows he has Deborah’s blessings.’
Pictured: Dame Deborah James and her husband Sebastien Bowen on a night out in London to celebrate their 11th wedding anniversary
Pictured: Dame Deborah with Sebastien, their two children Hugo and Eloise and the Prince of Wales in 2022
The bowel cancer campaigner told Sebastien he should go on to find love again (pictured, the couple together)
Dame Deborah who was best known for her BBC Radio show You, Me and the Big C, bravely battled against aggressive bowel cancer for five years before sadly losing her fight with the disease aged 40.
Prior to her death she described Sebastien as a ‘very eligible bachelor’ who would likely attract a lot of female attention in the future.
She said: ‘I have given him strict instructions: I want him to move on. He’s a handsome man, I’m, like ‘Don’t be taken for a ride, don’t marry a bimbo, find someone else who can make you laugh like we did.’
But she revealed there were a few women in their lives who she worried would make a beeline for Sebastien after her death and jokingly made a list of their names so he would avoid getting romantically involved with them.
She said: ‘I had a list of girls that I was like, right, they’re going to pounce on my husband.
‘And so I listed off a couple of names that I said that I would do my damned hardest to come and haunt him if he hooked up with those people, which I thought was absolutely hilarious.’
Sebastien, 45 works as a banker for private equity firm Pomona Capital. He lives in a smart house in one of London’s most exclusive districts and is well known in the area.
One local said: ‘Seb is a wonderful man, and everybody knows what a great and supportive husband he was to Deborah. It’s no secret that her death hit him really hard, so it’s great that he’s getting his life back on track. He deserves all the happiness in the world.’
Sebastien was raised in London and attended the exclusive St Paul’s School and then went on to study at the University of Edinburgh.
Pictured: Sebastien and Deborah with children Hugo and Eloise during a family holiday
Pictured: Dame Deborah poses for a photo in hospital with her mother Heather James
Prior to her death Dame Deborah described Sebastien as a ‘very eligible bachelor’ who would likely attract a lot of female attention in the future
Pictured: Bowel cancer campaigner Dame Deborah with her mother (centre) and daughter
The couple met at the former London nightclub, Cafe de Paris in 2005 and three years later they married in France.
In September 2021 they celebrated 13 years of marriage.
Taking to Instagram at the time to commemorate their anniversary Dame Deborah shared a heart-warming video of them dancing together in the South of France and wrote: ’13 Years of marriage. My Rock.’
The couple have two children, Hugo, 17 and Eloise, 15.
News of Sebastien’s return dating will also be welcomed by Dame Deborah’s mother Heather who said in an interview on the anniversary of her daughter’s passing: ‘We give Seb our blessing. We want him to move forward when he feels ready.
‘Deborah will be a hard act to follow, but he has our blessing. Because Deborah wanted him to move on, we want him to move on.’
Deborah died at her parents’ home in Woking, Surrey where she was cared for by them in the final weeks of her life, surrounded by her loved ones which included Sebastien and their two children.
In a BBC interview last year, he opened up about the painful process of watching his wife die.
Sebastien said: ‘It was just such a difficult, difficult time. It’s difficult to articulate how hard it really was.’
The loving husband, 43, was trust into the limelight after his wife, who was known as Bowel Babe, started campaigning and fundraising to raise awareness of bowel cancer after her own terminal diagnosis
Dame Deborah died at her parents’ home in Woking, Surrey where she was cared for by them in the final weeks of her life (pictured, Deborah and her mother)
Sebastien Bowen is the husband of the late Dame Deborah James who passed away from bowel cancer last year
Bowel cancer can cause you to have blood in your stools, a change in bowel habit, a lump inside your bowel which can cause an obstructions. Some people also suffer with weight loss a s a result of these symptoms
Sebastien said that Deborah had always ‘wanted to look forward to something’ – and that ‘she kept doing it till the very end’.
He also candidly spoke about there being a ‘peace’ to her death.
Sebastien said: ‘The reality is, it’s difficult to say, but I think she died in probably one of the best ways you could’ve hoped to die with this terrible disease.
‘She died surrounded by her mother, her father, her sister, me, all of us, holding our hands…being there for her…
‘It was as much as it can be and that’s the first time that I’d seen someone pass away but there was I think a peace to it.
‘I think she had done everything that she could’ve hoped to achieve.’
Dame Deborah was previously a deputy head teacher at Salesian College in Chertsey, Surrey but following her diagnosis of bowel cancer she documented her battle against the disease in a blog called Bowelbabe which kickstarted a career in journalism and made her social media sensation.
Up to the time of her death her Bowelbabe fund raised £11.3 million which has since increased to £16 million.
She was made a Dame by Prince William in May 2022 just a month before her death.
